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Jill Boultinghouse, MFT

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3 Myths About Bullying

3 Myths About Bullying After years of working in junior high and high schools as a school counselor, I learned a few things about bullies and their victims.  Bullying is a deliberate and repetitive act of aggression against someone of lesser power.  Bullies shop for victims, meaning that the victim is picked because he/she is vulnerable.  Bullies get what they want in the short term, but often lose in the long term. Here are some common myths about bullying: 1.  Bullies seek power because they …

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Expectations of Mind-Reading Will Doom You

Often we consciously or subconsciously expect our partners to know what we want or need.  Just this morning I spoke with a client who said "If my husband does not know that is what is expected then we have a big problem!" Different is fine, but mind-reading is not.  Differences don't kill a relationship, but impossible expectations do.  It is simply not humanly possible to mind-read and if you expect this in your relationships you will set yourself up for a lifetime of disappointments.  How can …

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Mother’s Day Blues

The Mother's Day Sadness So many times we hear how December and "the holidays' bring on depression, but I have noticed that Mother's Day can bring sadness, despair and depression for many.  I primarily have noticed that woman who have struggled or are still struggling with infertility can be heart broken this time of year.  Secondly I notice people who never had a good loving relationship with their mother can feel blue this time of year. And lastly those who have lost their mother can feel a …

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