Using Therapy to Strengthen a Couple’s Relationship
Every relationship has its challenges. Maybe you’re feeling distant, stuck in the same arguments, or unsure how to move forward after a breach of trust. Whether you’re in crisis or simply want to strengthen your connection, professional couples counseling sessions can help rebuild your relationship.
As a couples therapist with over 20 years of experience in Orange County, I provide marriage counseling, pre-marital counseling, and couples counseling. I really love working with couples to strengthen their relationships and/or addressing specific issues or problems.
When to Consider Couples Counseling
Couples therapy isn’t only for relationships in trouble.
Many couples seek support when they notice communication has broken down, conflicts keep repeating, or emotional or physical intimacy has faded. Some come in during major life transitions—like having children, relocating, or facing career shifts. Others arrive after an affair or betrayal and want to understand whether they can rebuild trust.
Common Reasons Couples Seek Therapy
Many couples reach out for therapy when they’re facing ongoing stress or conflict in their relationship. These challenges can build up over time or arise suddenly—and they’re often more common than you might think.
Some of the most frequent issues couples bring to counseling include:
- Poor communication, like constant arguing or emotional withdrawal
- Sexual problems
- Trust issues following infidelity or emotional affairs
- Tension with extended family or in-laws
- Financial disagreements
- Conflicting values, beliefs, or parenting styles
- Unresolved emotional pain or life stressors
- Separation
These issues don’t mean your relationship is broken. They mean you’re human—and that something important needs your attention. In my couples counseling sessions, you will find a safe space to slow down, listen differently, and begin to understand what’s really happening beneath the surface.
Here are some of the most recurring issues I’ve seen in over 20 years of experience as a couples therapist in Orange County:
Communication
Communication is at the heart of every relationship—but it’s also where many couples get stuck. You may feel like you don’t talk anymore, or that when you do, it ends in conflict or silence. The truth is, we’re always communicating—through our words, our body language, even our silence.
By not saying anything we are communicating. By going into the bathroom and locking the door after a fight we are communicating. By hugging we are communicating.
When communication breaks down, couples often feel emotionally distant or locked in reactive cycles of fighting or withdrawal. In therapy, I help you recognize what you’re really saying—both verbally and non-verbally—and uncover the patterns that may be keeping you stuck.
Together, we’ll work on breaking those patterns and learning new ways to express yourselves that create connection, clarity, and emotional safety to enhance your relationships with everyone.
Sexual Concerns
Our emotional and sexual lives are deeply connected. Often, what’s happening in a couple’s emotional dynamic shows up in their physical intimacy—and vice versa. That’s why many couples seek therapy when they’re experiencing challenges in their sexual relationship.
Common concerns include low desire, lack of fulfillment, premature ejaculation, pain during intercourse, or feeling sexually disconnected or incompatible. These issues can be difficult to talk about, but open communication is an important part of finding clarity and healing.
In couples counseling, I can help partners identify and communicate verbally and sexually with each other more clearly. I provide clients with directive homework assignments to learn new ways to communicate verbally and sexually.
Affairs
Infidelity is toxic to a relationship. The person who has been cheated on feels that he or she can no longer trust his or her partner. Even more damaging is that he or she loses trust in him or herself. However, couples can heal and recover from affairs. Some couples even begin to experience the relationship as stronger and healthier after treatment and recovery.
I can help you identify all of the complicated feelings associated with affairs. Expressing your feelings is an important part of treatment. Until the pain and grief can fully be explored and expressed, healing is not possible.
Treatment also involves finding what triggered the affair. I can help you find what triggered the affair, how to avoid the triggers whenever possible, and find new ways of managing them.
(It is important for me to distinguish between an affair and a sexual addiction. They are not treated the same way, and recovery is a different process. I can assist you in further exploration if you are concerned you or your partner has a sexual addiction – read more about Sexual Addiction Therapy.)
Start Where You Are
You don’t need to have it all figured out to begin. If you’re feeling disconnected or unsure how to move forward, reaching out is a brave and meaningful first step.
I offer in-person couples counseling sessions in South Orange County to help you reconnect with your partner.
Ready to take the first step?
Contact me today to schedule your consultation.